“It doesn’t take any more effort to dream a big dream than it takes to dream a small dream.”
General Wesley Clark, Former Head of NATO Allied Troops

Have you ever set a goal and then not achieved it?

If you said yes, you’re not alone; most of us are in that camp with you.  People set goals all the time and often make little progress towards achieving them.

We set goals because we think we should, because others are setting them, or because it’s part of being in business and the accountant says that’s what we should do.

Sound familiar?

Ever wondered why you don’t achieve your goals?

The answer is really simple.  Most often people don’t achieve their goals because they’re just not that important to them.

Harsh as it may sound, it’s true.  Often we miss achieving our goals because we don’t care enough about them.

Unless we have what I call ‘seductive clarity’ about what the dream, vision or goal is, and WHY it’s important to us, then it won’t be achieved.

What’s seductive clarity? 

Hold tight.   I’m about to get soppy on you!

Remember that moment when you fell in love, or saw your newly born child – your baby – for the very first time?  What did you feel in that moment?

I’m guessing it was a passion, a desire, a raw need, a drive, a responsibility, a happiness!

You were seduced by love!  And that’s a good thing.

In love, we want and need that person forever and a day.  Our hearts stop, we get distracted and can’t focus on anything other than the person we have fallen in love with.

Ahhh, I still rejoice with the memories of those early moments in love! 🙂

Get seductively clear on your ‘what’ and ‘why’

Seductive clarity with your dreams, vision and goals is the same.  You must feel the utmost emotional connection with them – a love – a heart stopping importance, a must have or must achieve drive, and the feeling – the excitement – that comes with the possibility of achieving something important.

We must understand WHY the dream is so important to us.  The ‘why’ doesn’t have to be rational to anyone else. It must matter to us!

If we don’t have all that, we won’t care enough to achieve the dream, vision or goal.  And when the going gets tough (which it will), we’ll be off and onto the next shiny thing… the dream, the vision, the goal will be forgotten or buried.

Yet, the achievement of a dream, a vision or goal can be life changing.  Its achievement can make an ordinary life extraordinary, or can be a game changer in business.

Let’s get serious about this for a minute 

We’re nearly half way through 2016 – yikes!!  How’s the business year progressing for you?

Same old, same old?

Or have you set a vision with some big goals that you’re on track towards achieving this year?

It’s not too late.  There’s plenty of time to nail something that’s important to you in business.  The key is to get seductively clear on what it is you want to achieve and WHY.

So go on.  Step back for a minute and think about what you’re striving to achieve in business this year.

Why are you doing it?

Why is its achievement so important to you?

In being seductively clear about and in love with your why, those emotions will keep you strong during the long hours and the ups and downs you’ll no doubt experience as you journey towards that day when you can say, ‘Eureka, I did it’, or as Sir Edmund Hillary said in 1953 upon being the first man to climb to the top of Mt Everest, ‘ I knocked the B******d off!’  🙂

Seductively clear big dreams and plenty of action……. leads to…..success – as you define it in business and in life!  I like the sound of that.

QUESTION:  Where are you at with seductive clarity in the vision and goals you have in 2016 for your business?  I’d love to know.  I’d be thrilled if you left a comment below.

Would some guidance from me be helpful to you? If so, please arrange a free 30 mins Skype strategy meeting with me. Here’s my calendar to make an appointment. I’d love to support you in some way to gain ‘seductive clarity’ in any aspect of your business or life.

The beauty of gratitude.  Hmmm, don’t you think that’s ‘pie in the sky’ sometimes – so out of reach when in the moment life is hectic and at times chaotic and difficult?

For me right now, life is going something like this.

Working long hours – loving what I’m doing and creating in the service of others.

Trying to create some semblance of balance between home and work commitments.

Loving and supporting our young teenage daughter who lives in the ‘now’….and is very into ‘her’ world.  Everyone and everything else is secondary – as a parent, some days it’s tear your hair out territory 🙂

Intermittent technology challenges that slow us down at work.

Loving a husband who’s ridiculously busy at work too.

Friends and family that I haven’t seen or chatted to in ages.

…… and so it goes on.

Know the feeling?

Life can be full, busy and tough

Yep, I get that.  Life happens and some days and weeks can be really hard going.  And there will be times when life is really, really tough.

Yet we can step away from it, if only for a moment

I know that if we lift ourselves away from the busyness, worry, tiredness, frustration and sadness, and focus on gratitude ─ simply being grateful for all that we are and have ─ then life and our vitality for it changes in a heartbeat.

So what is gratitude? 

Put simply, it’s ‘the feeling of being thankful’.  It’s about taking a moment in time to reflect on all that is good; all that is beautiful; all that is abundant.

Gratitude is being thankful for the big things and the smallest of things.  It’s being thankful for the day, the clean air, the beauty and joy of life and living, and the people who share our world, our health and vitality, our achievements, and the learning, lessons and ‘failing forward’ we do in life.  We can be grateful for all of this and more.

Gratitude is what you want it to be.

Practise the gratitude attitude

You may be saying… blah, blah, blah…. 🙂 … that’s ‘touchy feely, weirdo stuff’.  For the longest time, no-one has really talked about the benefits of gratitude.  There are worldwide conversations on it now though.

How about trying it for a week or two?  Take a few minutes out of each day to quiet your mind, feel the stillness of the moment, and think only good and grateful thoughts.

For me, gratitude is something I practise every day as I take to the park on my daily 6am power walks.  Those walks are sacrosanct ‘me time’ – and I make sure they happen day in day out, as they soothe my soul……and keep me sane, balanced and happy (even in the darkest of times).

There’s even research on gratitude

Reliable research demonstrates that by experiencing the emotion of gratitude there’s a positive impact on our mental and emotional states.  Quite simply, we become happier… just because!

Certainly that is how being grateful impacts me.  I am unconditionally happy, and I love living my life that way.

Happiness is not dependent

Happiness is not dependent on income, achievement, health and fitness, or social status.  It’s a state of being.  And research also shows that some of the happiest people on earth actually have the least and live in the most difficult of situations… go figure that!

In being grateful and happy, we attract more.  We attract more prosperity and success in its widest definition.

We attract people to us, as we’re good to be around and they are energised by our enthusiasm.

Gratitude in business is critical too

Our clients want to ‘feel’ that we’re grateful for their business.  If we are and they ‘feel’ it, then they’re likely to become loyal and supportive; they become our cheerleaders.  Team members ─ be they employees, outsourced team members or collaborators ─ will be more supportive of us if they feel that they are valued.

Gratitude is a muscle

Gratitude is like a muscle that needs to be worked on to improve.  It takes time and ongoing practise for it to become better and easier to do.

The rewards are phenomenal though.  Once worked on, the glorious gratitude muscle will simply kick in most of time in life, even during the hardest of times.

So, go on.  Give gratitude a go…. At least for a week, and note how you feel.  You may be surprised.  I was when I tried it.  Now I’m a ‘gratitude groupie’.  🙂

QUESTION:  How has gratitude impacted your life? I’d love to hear your own experiences with the beauty of gratitude.  Please share a comment below and let’s get the glorious gratitude conversation going.

Would some guidance from me be helpful to you? If so, please arrange a free 30 mins Skype strategy meeting with me. Here’s my calendar to make an appointment. I’d love to support you in some way to gain ‘seductive clarity’ in any aspect of your business or life.

Think of the people you admire.

Chances are, they’re just like you and me ..… ordinary people doing the extraordinary – as they (or we) define it.

I’ve had the pleasure of meeting, working with, coaching and interviewing the most extraordinary people over the last 30 years.

Yes, some are hugely successful entrepreneurs, business leaders, sports people, and celebrities.  Others are people who are living life on their terms, ordinary people with extraordinary lives.

There’s no straight road

Their journeys haven’t been easy or straight forward.  They’ve had twists and turns, stops and starts, successes and failures, yet they’ve risen above it all to be, have, achieve and give all that they desire.

I’ve noticed there are common threads, common beliefs that have guided those extraordinary people to be who they are.

Here are the seven beliefs of extraordinary people.  You can model these beliefs too.

Belief 1:  100 percent accountability

Life is full of tough bits.  Extraordinary people find ways to get through them.  What they don’t do is get resentful, give up or sit back in a fog of self-entitlement, waiting for their luck to change.  They understand and accept that life is a journey.  They are 100 percent accountable and responsible for everything in their lives.

Belief 2:  People matter

On one hand, this has become a truism of modern life: people matter. On the other hand, most of us forget it, every day.  Often we take our loved ones for granted.  We do what we need to, in order to keep the home fires burning or to fulfil our social or business obligations, and we forget that this is a dimension of life in which we can either succeed or… not.  Extraordinary people recognise that people are critical in all parts of their lives – business and personal – and they treasure them.

Belief 3:  Constant learning

Success in its widest definition is built on staying dynamic.  Not settling.  Continuing to learn.  Often as adults we forget how exciting it is to learn and grow, and how vital this is to a meaningful life.

Extraordinary people also grow by being productive.  They create; they don’t just consume.  It might be pottery or cupcakes or electronic music.  It could be something more amorphous: setting up a Corporate Social Responsibility Committee or putting together a library of kids’ books for the local children’s hospital.  Any process that incorporates learning, problem solving and creativity into our lives enables us to grow.

Belief 4:  No such thing as failure

Personal growth only happens when something changes, and change is often painful.  It means we risk failure, which is very often painful.  But failure is a fact of life for anyone who is dynamic, and failures are fast tracks to growth.  Extraordinary people don’t view them as failures. They see them as opportunities for learning.  We should try to fear failure less.  How about ‘failing forward’, as I call it?

Belief 5:  Everything happens for a reason

As much as this is hard to take when times are tough, we are where we are in life right now for a reason.  There are lessons and learnings to take from our current experience and situation.  There are new horizons on offer because we are at this juncture.  When we learn the lessons we move forward, often in new and unexpected ways.  Extraordinary people understand that, and look for the lessons in all dimensions, so they can move forward, fast.

Belief 6:  Commitment and focus

As Shakespeare said:  “Nothing comes from doing nothing”.  One of the fundamental traits of extraordinary people is their ability to deploy laser-like focus on achieving their goals, no matter the distractions, challenges, bumps and bruises along the way.  For as long as the goals remain relevant to them, extraordinary people remain committed and focused.  When we really focus on something, we turbo-boost our efforts and see more clearly how to do the work.

Belief 7:  Happiness and gratitude

Happiness is a decision we make.  It’s not derived from an event, nor is it dependent on somebody else.  Happiness is not a stroke of luck.  Too many people say, ‘I’d be happy if ……’ or, ‘I’ll be happy when ……….’  Pinning our happiness on something that has yet to come to pass is a sure-fire way to miss the happiness available to us in the here and now.

The practice of gratitude is absolutely fundamental to replenishing our energy reserves.  It is one of the key ways in which we choose happiness for ourselves and it also boosts our ability to empathise with others and live in a more open-hearted and generous way.

Extraordinary people know that happiness and gratitude is central to their sparkle in life.  In some way, it also outwardly contributes to their magnetism that we’re attracted to.

Simple!  Right?

You’ve made it.  They’re the seven beliefs of extraordinary people.  They aren’t unique to others. They’re simple strategies that work and can be mastered by us all.

Are you up for it?

Say yes, and become extraordinary – as you define it.

QUESTION:  Which of the seven beliefs do you practice already?  Let me know in the comments below.  I’d love to read your thoughts.

Would some guidance from me be helpful to you? If so, please arrange a free 30 mins Skype strategy meeting with me. Here’s my calendar to make an appointment. I’d love to support you in some way to gain ‘seductive clarity’ in any aspect of your business or life.

Life’s about giving, right?  Certainly in my world it is.  I live by the motto:  “To Give is to Live”.

For me, I feel more alive, passionate and extraordinary when I’m giving – when I’m adding something to the life of another.

My giving has been in overdrive lately …. and despite having a very hectic schedule right now, I’ve never felt more happy, alive and passionate.

And do you know what? Extraordinary things are happening for everyone in my world.  It’s electric.  It’s exciting.  It’s sizzling!

There are so many wins for everyone when we give.  Here are a few that are top of mind for me at present.

Bonus 1 ─ We feel good

I have a constant ‘smile on my dial’ right now.  Why?  Because I’m adding value to others in big and small ways.

There’s something glorious that happens when we know we’ve done something for the benefit of others, not because we have to, but because we want to.  It makes us feel good.  In actual fact, we may even feel better than the person who’s received our giving.

Perhaps it’s saying hello to or smiling at a person as we walk down the street.

Or giving a bunch of flowers or other gift.

Maybe it’s passing on knowledge and experience….

The ways of giving are endless, and it feels really, really, good.

Bonus 2 – People are grateful

We should give freely and without expectation.  When we do, the side benefit is that the receiver is often very grateful for our kindness and generosity.  And right now we need to celebrate more kindness in the world, don’t you think?

Bonus 3 – We help others to be more successful

In my experience, with more giving comes more success.

We’re all full of knowledge, experience and wisdom that when we share it, it helps others to be more successful.  Perhaps it’s a connection you make for them, or some business or life advice.

When we share our gifts, the world is more plentiful.

Bonus 4 – Greater opportunities appear

You’ve heard the saying: “If you want to go fast, go alone; if you want to go far, go in the company of others”.  I know that to be true.

When we have conversations, share, give or collaborate, greater opportunities often appear as the ‘master-mind’ is at play.  As my mother used to say, “two heads are better than one”.

Together, we think differently, at times bigger, often better… we all get better results, and that’s uplifting.

Bonus 5 – Good things come back to you

When we give, it’s also good to receive.  Bob Burg, in his best -selling book:  The Go-Giver, talks about the 5 Laws of Giving – one of them is Receptivity – we must be willing to receive.  For some of us, that’s easier said than done.  I’ve certainly had to learn that skill.

When we give to others, they’ll often give back to us in ways we didn’t expect (and that’s a good thing – surprise is good for the soul).

Give, give, give, ASK.  It’s good to ask.  Ask for guidance, help, support.

Be vulnerable.  Be brave.  Be courageous.  Be visionary.  The reasons for asking come in many forms, and good people want to help us.

When we give, people will help us in return.  The circle of life.

Your turn

How can you give more of yourself to others?  Whose life can you make a difference to today?

Perhaps that’s a daily action.  Make a difference in the life of someone each day.  If we all did that, is it too big a hope to think that our world would be a happier, kinder, smarter and more successful place to be?  I think not.

QUESTION:  Have you experienced the bonuses of giving?  I’d love to hear your stories.  Please leave a comment below.

Would some guidance from me be helpful to you? If so, please arrange a free 30 mins Skype strategy meeting with me. Here’s my calendar to make an appointment. I’d love to support you in some way to gain ‘seductive clarity’ in any aspect of your business or life.