Success Secrets of Successful People

What are the success secrets of successful people? Have you ever wondered?

I have. In fact, I have spent most of my adult life exploring this topic. What makes some people successful in all areas of their life and others not? For me, it is a fascinating topic of study. As Tony Robbins says: “Success leaves clues.”

Some people achieve great success in business, where they have millions in the bank, but they are empty and alone in their lives. Is that success? I think not.

Others seem to have a successful life, filled with lots of people and joy, but they don’t have the financial freedom to enable them to have the complete success that they want. Is that success?

Then there are the people I study. The people who appear to have it all. Financial freedom – for some, they have more money and business/career success than most; they have an enviable lifestyle; they have great relationships; they have excellent health, well-being and spirituality; and importantly, they are generous. Those are the people I study and model in my own life.

I have distilled all the knowledge and experience I have gained from my life of study in this area into the 7 Success Secrets of Successful People.

In brief, they are:

1) Sense of Purpose
Successful people have a clear vision about, and direction in which they want the whole of their life to go, and they focus on achieving it.

2) Self Belief
They have unwavering self belief, regardless of how difficult life gets for them….and it does. Life is not plain sailing for anyone.

3) Serve Others
In all that they do, successful people believe they are here to serve others – in their professional and personal lives. As Eleanor Roosevelt said: “If you cease to make a contribution you begin to die”. That sums up how successful people feel.

4) Supreme Excellence
Successful people strive to achieve excellence in what they do. They persist. They practice their skill. Plus they always expect the best, and in expecting it, that outcome is achieved in all that they do, and all that they are in life.

5) Self-Disciplined
Successful people are incredibly self-disciplined. They have the stamina to go the distance. They also recognise that failure is a seed towards success; that it is part of the journey, the process towards success.

6) Sacrosanct Priorities
Successful people have sacrosanct priorities in their life. There are 5 of them.

a) Fantastic time management.
b) Focus on their health and well-being.
c) Recognising the importance of their relationships – their life partner, their children and wider family, friends and business associates.
d) Community connection – giving to the communities of which they are a part.
e) Exuding a ‘zest for life’ – joy; love; happiness.

7) Self Improvement
Successful people recognise that life is about ongoing learning. They seek wisdom. They reflect. They develop a spiritual connection.

So that’s it in summary: the 7 Success Secrets of Successful People.

Do you emulate the 7 Success Secrets of Successful People? If not, what can you focus on now? Where can you make changes in your life to support the success you would like to achieve? Perhaps start with developing clarity, clarity over how you want your life to be!

Dream big! Set bold and beautiful goals. Get clear on your personal values system. Perhaps create a vision board so it brings your life vision to life.

Then get moving… start creating your successful life.

Would you like to be part of my success community? Each week I interview successful people, and ‘subject matter experts’ on topics related to success. Join us and be inspired towards achieving your own successful life. Here’s the link to join us. I look forward to welcoming you to my community of people who are creating success in their lives – as they define it!

Could some guidance from me be helpful to you? If so, please arrange a free 30 mins Skype strategy meeting with me. Here’s my calendar to book a meeting. I’d love to support you in some way to gain ‘seductive clarity’ in any aspect of your business or life.

Other articles on What Creates Success in Business and Life:

Success Breeds Success – Tip #1
Success Breeds Success!
Adèle in a Nutshell – ‘To Give is to Live’
Reflect, Smile and Smell the Christmas Lilies!
The Beauty of the Last Hours in Life
What’s Stopping You? FEAR?
Savour the Journey
What’s all this Gratitude ‘stuff’?
The 7 Traits of High Achievers
What’s Your Excuse? No Arms? No Legs?

Successful Goal Setting Tips

...Why SMART Goals aren’t…. and BRAZEN Goals™ are!

It’s that time of year again where many of us are returning to work after a leisurely couple of weeks (or months) of festivities and then holidays. Are you ready to hit the year running, both personally and in your business?

Many of us have been seeking successful goals setting tips in the lead up to the end of December, so that we can begin anew in January.
Have you set your New Year’s Resolutions? I hope not. We all know that they don’t work.

When I was a teenager, I used to set New Year’s Resolutions, being revved up for a couple of weeks to lose weight or make more money. But soon the momentum was lost, as really, the resolutions were just words in my head, or occasionally on a bit of paper. By month end (at worst) or several months later at best, I had completely forgotten about my resolutions, having moved onto other things that were in my mind’s eye at that point in time.

Have you set SMART goals? You know, goals that are: Specific, Measurable, Attainable, Realistic, Time-bound? Again, I hope not.

After giving up on New Year’s Resolutions, I turned to SMART goals, and while they often worked, in recent years, as I have learnt more about goal setting, I have come to realise that SMART goals are potentially and often, limiting. When goals are immediately attainable or realistic, in my opinion, something is missing.

For me, goals need to be big and bold. They must induce some passion. They must be heart stoppingly exciting. They have to make me want to punch the air, saying: ‘Yes, I want to achieve that goal. I have no idea how yet, but it is really important to me that I do’. That’s what goals setting should feel like for me.

I want a ‘magical happening’ life, and I clearly understand, to achieve that, I have to create my own life, my way. I have a vision of sitting in my rocking chair aged 101 years and reflecting on the wonderful and eventful life I have had and continue to have – even at 101 year! There will be no stopping me.

What type of life are you creating for yourself?

So, I created the BRAZEN Goals System™, and that works much better for me. I love the word ‘brazen’ as defined in the Oxford Dictionary to mean: bold, shameless, unabashed, defiant, barefaced, cheeky.

BRAZEN Goals™ are:

B = Bold (and very big).
R = Ranked (for importance).
A = Accountable (specific, measurable, time-bound).
Z = Zealous (personally/professionally important).
E = Expedient (planned and actioned).
N = Nurturing (and empowering).

BRAZEN Goals™ in a nutshell:

B = Bold and Big

Think about a time when you achieved something that was initially out of your reach; out of your comfort zone. How did it feel to achieve the goal? On top of the world? Like you could conquer anything? Certainly that is how I feel when I achieve goals ─ both personal and professional ones ─ that are important to me.

Why settle for little or easily achievable goals? In my experience when we don’t have a tight emotional connection to the goal, we don’t achieve it. Make the goal matter. Make it bold and big.

At the start you won’t have a clue how you will achieve it, but don’t let that stop you, for if it is important enough, you will find a way!

R = Ranked for Importance

I believe we need to take time out to dream and to create a long list of goals we want to achieve. However, all goals are not equal. Some are more important than others. If we focus on achieving easier or lesser important goals, then at year-end we are likely to be disappointed. As well, often in achieving a big and bold goal, a number of smaller ones are easily achieved. So after the dreaming is done, then comes the task of ranking and ordering goals into priorities.

A = Accountable (Specific, Measurable, Time-bound)

After ranking the goals so that my top goals are the key ones I will focus on, I then get accountable with myself. I ensure each goal is specific, measureable and time-bound. If they are not, then it is unlikely I will achieve them as they are just ideas in my head until I start getting accountable.

Z= Zealous (Personally/Professionally Important)

I just love the word ‘zealous’ as it reflects me: someone who has great energy, enthusiasm and commitment. Therefore, my goals had better be zealous too, otherwise I know I will lose interest as time passes, and not focus on them.

So I ask myself various questions, including: Why am I focusing on achieving these goals? Why am I going to move heaven and earth, make big changes in my world and take massive action to achieve them? What happens if I don’t achieve them?

E = Expedient (Planned and Actioned)

Without planning for the achievement of the goals, accompanied by a set of actions, it is unlikely that much will happen. Meticulous planning and self accountability is important.

N = Nurturing and Empowering

Finally my BRAZEN Goals™ are in place, and I am on the path towards achieving them. It will not be a straight line towards their achievement. There will be bumps and bruises. There will be mistakes and failures along the way. BUT, as the achievement of these goals is important, it is equally important that I have a Nurture and Empowerment Plan to support my journey.

How will I continue to remind myself of the zealous nature of these goals along the way?

When I achieve milestones along the way, how will I nurture and pat myself on the back to acknowledge the interim achievement? That is important too.

When the going gets tough and I want to give up, how will I nurture and empower myself to remain focused?

What Next?

That’s it. I am ready to brazenly achieve in 2015. Are you?

If you would like to know more to help you set BRAZEN Goals™ in 2015 too, then please click here to receive my BRAZEN Goal System™, BRAZEN Goals Action™ template and other supporting resources. It’s all free – my New Year’s gift to you.

I hope my BRAZEN Goals System™ provides you with successful goal setting tips to ensure you have a magical 2015.

Other articles on Goal Setting:

Goal Setting Tips #1
Goal Setting Tips #2
Goal Setting Tips #3

Reflect, Smile and Smell the Christmas Lilies!

Whew, it’s nearly the end of the year for 2014. And what a year it was! How was it for you? For me it ended up being a year where the theme was ‘change’, both personally and professionally. That certainly wasn’t how I expected the year to be when planning for it a year ago. Were there any themes to your year?

It’s really easy to look back on the year and ‘kick myself’ over all the things I didn’t achieve. You know, beating myself up for not ticking all the ’achieved’ or ‘completed’ boxes in my business plan or in my personal goal sheet.

Are you doing this? Reflecting on what you didn’t achieve in business or in life? If you are someone who sets New Year’s Resolutions, are you looking at the list you created on New Year’s Eve 2013 and beating yourself up for not achieving them in 2014?

If you are beating yourself up, how are you feeling? Grumpy? Disappointed? Probably! Certainly, that is normally how I feel if I miss a goal on my never ending list of things I want to do and achieve.

It is also really easy to reflect on all the things that went wrong in 2014, rather than those things that went well.

So I’m reviewing 2014 differently. I am not reviewing Q4 of my 2014 business plan right now, nor am I looking at my 2014 personal goal sheet. I want to end the year on a high. I’m reflecting on the good things; the lovely things – big and small – that happened this year. I am grateful for all that I have in my life, and all those people in my life whom I care about. It’s a much better feeling. It brings joy and happiness.

Don’t get me wrong. Soon I will be finishing off my 2015 business plan, personal goal sheet and accompanying vision board; that is important, as I do like to achieve things, and I have plenty I will be working on achieving in 2015. But for now, that can wait.

I’m feeling reflective. I’m feeling grateful. I’m feeling joyful. I’m feeling thankful. Life is not perfect. It never is. But life is good. Why? Because it just is. And life is short.

Right now, life is good because:

In early 2014, London was alive with Spring colour and floral aromas – daffodils and other intoxicating flowers. It was glorious.
We periodically played Bridge (card game) with close friends in 2014 and it was such fun (and competitive).
The British Summer was fabulously warm, enabling our daughter and her friends to play outside in the garden – just as kids should do in Summer – for a change there was little use of technology as ‘fun’.
We had loads of family BBQ dinners at our home, where friends congregated to catch up, and all the children ran wild outside.
Visitors from overseas came to stay for periods of time so they could also experience our beloved London.
I continued reinventing ‘me’ and my career for the next +51 years of life (I plan to live and work until I am 101 years old)… very exciting. 🙂
I have met loads of new and interesting people from around the world.
Our daughter was able to have several weeks in New Zealand in April, creating memories with her extended family, and particularly with my mother, her grandmother.
We got home to New Zealand in time to be with my mother before she passed over in October, and I was able to sit with mum through the night that she passed; I have unforgettable memories of that moment in time.
We now have both our children living with us…. and it is great fun being a family with an adult son (27 years) and daughter (12 years) all living together.
As a family we play lots of board and card games and table tennis together, plus we go on family ‘outings’.
I power walked around my local village most days for the last half of this year, swinging my arm weights with reckless abandon…. I even managed a couple of runs too.
In December, I celebrated being married for 14 years to David, the man of my dreams.
We enjoyed the company of a number of ‘elderly’ people who are in our lives, like my 100 year old relative in Scotland, and others who are a little lonely.
On 25 December, we are having a family Christmas at home; the first time in many years as a complete ‘nuclear family.

There is a lot more that I am happy about and grateful for. What are you grateful for? What puts the ‘smile on your dial’ as you reflect on 2014?

I’m loving the time where I am reflecting, smiling and smelling the Christmas lilies. And in smelling the Christmas Lilies, wonderful memories are flooding back. Christmas lilies (or Lilium Candidum) are one of my favourite flowers and will forever remind me of our wedding day as they were ‘our’ flowers on our special day.

Go on. Reflect. Smile. Smell the Christmas Lilies. Life is too short not to. Tomorrow is another day. 2015 will soon be another year where we can set more goals that we plan to achieve.

Other articles on What Creates Success in Business and Life:

Success Breeds Success!
Success Secrets of Successful People
Adèle in a Nutshell – ‘To Give is to Live’
The Beauty of the Last Hours in Life
Success Breeds Success – Tip #1
What’s Stopping You? FEAR?
Savour the Journey
What’s all this Gratitude ‘stuff’?
The 7 Traits of High Achievers
What’s Your Excuse? No Arms? No Legs?

‘To Give Is To Live’… An Early New Year Present?

Dear Friends

Wouldn’t it be great for 2015 to be the best year yet in your business? That is the goal all my clients have set for themselves, and I am guiding them towards achieving that outcome.

I have a gift for you. To help you plan for the success you are seeking in your business in 2015, next week I am offering you a FREE 30 minute Skype call with me, where I will help you in any way you request. I offer my +20 years of business experience working with large and small businesses around the world, giving you any tips and guidance you need to make 2015 your best year yet in business.

You are probably asking: “Are there any strings attached?” The answer is: No; there are no strings attached!

You see, I expected to be in New Zealand for around one month to be with my mother before she passed over, but sadly, she left us sooner than we thought she would, so I have come home early, and my work diary is empty next week. I am in awe of the love and support my mother and family received from mum’s community during the most challenging two years of her life, and particularly near the end of her life, so I want to ‘pay it forward’ to the business owners in my community around the world. I want to lovingly and unconditionally support you with my skills and knowledge.

What are your burning questions or issues that I could help you with? Make a list and throw them at me; I will do my very best to guide you.

The offer is on a first come first served basis next week, from 10am Monday, 17 November to 8pm Friday, 21 November. All you have to do is click on this link, and book yourself a 30 minute time slot with me. Please remember to include your Skype address too, so I can call you; we can’t confirm an appointment without your Skype address included in the booking request.

In order to accommodate as many people as possible across multiple time zones, most days I will host meetings from 6am up to 11pm (GMT). If you are keen to have a half hour Skype call with me and really cannot commit to any of the times available, then please separately communicate with me on email, and we will see what we can do to accommodate your situation.

So, that is it. My personal motto is: “To Give Is To Live”. In memory of my mum, that is my ‘give’ to my business community next week. I hope you take up the opportunity, as I would love to support you.

To recap, the offer is on a first come first served basis next week, from 10am Monday, 17 November to 8pm Friday, 21 November. All you have to do is click on this link, and book yourself a 30 minute time slot with me. Please remember to include your Skype address too, so I can call you; we can’t confirm an appointment without your Skype address included in the booking request.

I look forward to supporting you with your business success.

Adèle X

The Beauty of the Last Hours in Life

In the stillness of the early hours of Tuesday 28 October, with Dad fitfully sleeping next to her and wrapping a loving arm around her; family and friends in the southern hemisphere holding her close to their hearts as they also slept; and family and friends elsewhere in the world praying for our family, I sat with our mother, wife, grandmother, sister, mother-in-law, friend – Margaret (Gretta) – during what I knew would be her final hours in this life.

Mum was in a peaceful coma; her body had closed down but due to a lifetime of keeping fit, her heartbeat was strong. The beauty of that night was a moment in time that I will never forget and that I now share with those closest to me.

A dim light provided some relief from the darkness so I could see mum, and with a local radio station playing suitably soothing music to mum and me through the night, we chatted. They say that hearing is the last sense to leave a dying person. From my recent life experiences with the passing of my father-in-law and with mum in her last hours, I know this to be true.

You see, the only way in which mum could communicate with me during those last hours was via her heartbeat. When she was touched by what I said, her heartbeat slowed and/or softened… and then her heartbeat would return in all its strength. Mum’s heartbeat slowed and softened many times that night as I had the most intimate of conversations with her.

As the first born to mum and dad, for three quarters of my life mum and I were tightly connected. Stuff happens and distance alters relationships; that certainly happened for mum and me in recent years. Notwithstanding, we had a deep understanding of and love for each other. We respected the way in which we were leading our respective lives and the life choices we had made; we were proud of each other.

So those last hours were a completion of this phase of our journey together. The future of our relationship would take a different form. Mum’s spirit and soul would soon soar above me and all others whom she loved.

Having been told on 1 October that there was no more that medical science could do for her, mum asked the Doctor who delivered the heart breaking news: “How is your mother, Doctor? You said she has been unwell”. Mum had weeks left in this life, but she loved and cared for everyone around her, always putting others before herself.

Mum was a deeply Christian woman whose faith had been central to her life, so the word JOY had a special meaning for her. She believed that one should put Jesus and Others before Yourself….. mum lived her life like that. Illness over the last two years had robbed mum of the lifetime of good health and vitality that she had enjoyed. Testimony to the JOY mum lived was the outpouring of love she received from her many friends and family around the world upon hearing of her life changing health challenges from mid 2012.

My daughter Gemma and I arrived in New Zealand from London where we live on Friday 24 October. As we were driving to see mum in her home town of Hamilton at what seemed like break neck speed in the hope that she was still alive, my beautiful and very thoughtful 12 year old asked what for me was the ultimate in unanswerable questions.

“Mummy, why is God being so mean to Nana, when for all of her life, Nana has been so good to God?”

Even with immense pain and suffering, mum wanted to remain living, and she had told those around her while she was still able to speak that she wanted life. However, in the last moments of her life that I shared, I believe I saw and felt mum experience a beautifully dignified peacefulness, calm and acceptance as she passed over.

And while I may never be able to answer Gemma’s question in any way that might satisfy her, what I do believe is that mum’s spirit is now being cradled in the arms of her beloved mother, Daisy ─ our Granny ─ something that mum will find comfort, happiness and peace with.

Mum will watch over us with a loving and caring heart; she will look after those who are special and important to us, and who departed before her. Because that is what mum did…. she lived for caring for others. She lived for JOY – Jesus, Others, Yourself… in that order.

Mum left us in the certain knowledge and security that she will be wrapped in the warmth of her God, the God she had cherished, respected and trusted ─ through good times and bad ─ for all of her life.

Personally, I am taking comfort in that knowledge, and I hope over time Gemma will do so too. I also hope that mum’s certainty over what was on offer for her after this phase in her life will be of comfort to all others who shared her life after the immediate feelings of grief, sadness, anger and loss have subsided a little.

Mum, you are and will always be much loved by many. Rest in Peace, my love.

She Is Gone – by David Harkins

You can shed tears that she is gone,
Or you can smile because she has lived.

You can close your eyes and pray that she’ll come back,
Or you can open your eyes and see all she’s left.

Your heart can be empty because you can’t see her,
Or you can be full of the love you shared.

You can turn your back on tomorrow and live yesterday,
Or you can be happy for tomorrow because of yesterday.

You can remember her only that she is gone,
Or you can cherish her memory and let it live on.

You can cry and close your mind, be empty and turn your back.
Or you can do what she’s want,
Smile. Open your eyes. Love, and go on.

Other articles on What Creates Success in Business and Life:

Success Breeds Success!
Success Secrets of Successful People
Reflect, Smile and Smell the Christmas Lilies!
Success Breeds Success – Tip #1
Adèle in a Nutshell – ‘To Give is to Live’
What’s Stopping You? FEAR?
Savour the Journey
What’s all this Gratitude ‘stuff’?
The 7 Traits of High Achievers
What’s Your Excuse? No Arms? No Legs?

Redefining Success – in 7 Dimensions

Money, status, assets, power! They’re the markers of success, right?

Certainly that’s how I measured success for a long time. I had a successful business and career, and I had the trappings of success as I defined it – money, sports car, million dollar house, gorgeous wardrobe of clothes, expensive jewellery (until it all got stolen – but that’s a story for another day), travel……you get the picture.

Have you ever wondered if defining success as money, status, assets and power is a little, well, last century, one dimensional thinking? I had started to wonder about this in my life…..

Then something happened.

Life in all its beauty, joy, heartbreak and sadness tumbled over me during a series of years, challenging and uplifting me to the core of my soul….

The birth of our beautiful baby girl.

Losing money, making money.

The power of love, and the emptiness of being alone.

Death of loved ones.

The destruction of relationships and broken trust.

The unexpected death of babies – my friends’ and my own.

Health, fitness and illness, and the opportunity we have to create our personal wellbeing (or not).

The glory of travel, learning about and treasuring diversity.

The power of choice in life, and insidious nature of living as a ‘victim’.

The beauty of spirituality and legacy, and the sadness of it too.

What is success, really?

The universe was asking me to reconsider what success in life really means. And so I did!

I created the Seven Dimensions of Success – my new model and barometer of success. No more one dimensional, last century thinking for me!

Success as I define it is based on the balance we can create in seven key areas of life – in no particular order:

Wellbeing
Growth
Achievement
Relationships
Experiences
Spirituality
Legacy

You might be thinking: “Oh, she’s into that woo woo, weirdo, stuff. I’m not having a bar of that!”

If you are, I’m smiling, as you’re not alone…. and once upon a time, I’d have been in your ‘camp’ too. But, please hear me out for a bit.

Aren’t seven dimensions more exciting than one?

Living in London, I hear of and read stories about people who are working themselves to the bone – day and night. Work hard, play hard is the ‘mantra’ in the City of London and amongst bankers, in particular. They work seriously ridiculous hours, and the ‘play hard’ often includes partying, serious drinking, drugs, sex… and a whole lot more…. Yes, some are earning plenty of money, but is that really success?

Or there are others – entrepreneurs and business owners who have achieved tremendous financial and business success? But at what cost? How’s their health and fitness? Or their most important relationships with their partners and children? Often there’s a cost. Is it too much?

Then there are yet others who have terrible things that happen to them, and they live in a state of victimhood – lifeless, directionless, and at times addicted to goodness knows what.

It starts with a DREAM

Here comes the ‘woo woo’ again, but I truly believe that success is based on having a DREAM for our lives. Actually knowing what we want in life and then working towards it in all dimensions. For me, DREAM means, Destiny, Represented Evocatively, Actively and Magnetically.

If we don’t know the DREAM, then we’ve got no path to follow in life… and we’ll end up anywhere or nowhere, and possibly towards the end of our lives, pretty sad that we haven’t made more of our journey through life.

I believe there’s a better way. Rather than striving for more and more one-dimensional success, aiming for perfect and feeling like a failure when we inevitably miss perfection, exhausting ourselves in the process, we would do better to identify the things we truly value and then work to generate more of them in our lives.

Please don’t think I’m knocking aspiration. I’m not! I’m hugely aspirational in my life – as one measure of my success.

So, start with working out what you want in all seven dimensions of YOUR life… then create a plan towards getting there.

Seven dimensions of success – what are they?

Life should be multi-layered. For me, it’s about love, adventure, creativity, people, books, dancing, great food, conversations, silence, laughter, fun, the beauty of precious moments, charity, curiosity, learning, teaching, giving… it’s also about those more traditional markers. I’m really into my career and business success is important too… but not at all costs. Life should be full, rich and exciting. It should also be evolving all the time.

As you can see from the Heptagram, there’s no hierarchy with the seven dimensions of success; it’s not that growth is more important than relationships, or that spirituality counts for more than achievement. Think of the Heptagram as a nudge to expand your imagination as you start to explore what success means to you. You can move from one category to another and back again. They all flow from one to another; they’re all inter-connected.

You will naturally find that you’re more attracted to some areas than others. That’s fine. You may also find some concepts uncomfortable. A lot of us are deeply uneasy about the idea of making wealth, for example (that’s one of the markers within the achievement dimension). We think rich people must by definition be greedy, or believe that wanting a certain lifestyle makes us shallow. Others dismiss all talk of spirituality. We label it as not for us – religious dogma or hippy nonsense. By thinking in this way we stay comfortable within our own narrow definition of success and cut ourselves off from potential fulfilment.

Use the Heptagram to explore and challenge your beliefs about what’s possible for you. As you’re reading the descriptions below, jot down in a notebook any thoughts or ideas that occur to you, especially if a particular dimension either appeals or puts you off. You might have a light bulb moment and start to feel energy forming around goals or aspirations.

Wellbeing

While there is no hierarchy within the seven success dimensions, for me wellbeing is the foundation of everything we do and everything we can achieve. We might have all the money in the world, be successful on every measure, but if we don’t have our health, vitality and wellbeing, we won’t be able to enjoy it.

I’m not talking about being a size eight or having a seriously enviable six pack, although if you aspire to those things, go for it. Do the work and make them happen. I am referring to looking after ourselves in the widest sense.

Why is it that in the richest nations of the world, the people are the fattest and sickest, often drug dependent? For me, it’s because so many of us have lost a sense of accountability for our own health and wellbeing. We cannot delegate this. It’s our responsibility.

Do you eat the right food, drink ample water, get plenty of sleep? Are you taking regular exercise? Are you nurturing yourself as you would your child or a friend who wasn’t well? If not, why not? It’s not self-indulgent, it’s basic self-care.

This stuff often feels like a chore (especially, for many of us, our diet or exercise regime) but small changes can reap huge rewards. Rather than thinking of wellbeing as an old enemy or dull routine, see it as a source of easy nurturing wins.

Growth

Seven-dimensional success is built on staying dynamic. Don’t settle. Keep learning. Babies and children grow every day, not just their bodies but their body of knowledge. As adults we forget how exciting it is to learn and grow, and how vital to a meaningful life.

Successful people grow by being productive. I’m talking about producing in the broadest sense: making things happen. Any process that incorporates learning, problem solving and creativity into our lives enables us to grow.

Personal growth only happens when something changes, and change is often painful. It means we risk failure, which is very often painful. But failure is a fact of life for anyone who is dynamic, and failures are fast tracks to growth. We should try to fear them less.

Growth also leads to new opportunity, new horizons and new people in our lives. That’s exciting.

Achievement

So here comes the bit about traditional markers of success, whether it’s making a good salary, building a successful business, creating wealth through investment, reaching the pinnacle of your profession, getting published, winning awards, being influential, well-known or even famous.

These are all wonderful goals – just because they’re the ones we are more familiar with doesn’t make them less valid. We all long to be recognised for our achievements. When we are paid well for our work, we feel appreciated. And money is handy, as anyone who has ever been without it will tell you.

The interesting thing for me, though is that this is the dimension of success that brings disillusionment as well as satisfaction. We need to watch it with achievement, to make sure that we’re not getting sucked into a cycle of competitiveness, or always needing more. There are ways to offset that risk.

The flip side of getting hooked on winning (I’ve met a lot of achievement junkies in my time) is thinking that it’s shallow to want to earn a good salary, or win an award. That’s a self-defeating approach, not to mention a judgmental one. When we push ourselves to be the best we can personally be, our life feels richer as a result.

Relationships

When a nurse who worked with people who were dying was asked what her patients most regretted, she responded, ‘Not spending more time with loved ones.’ Her interview went viral. Millions of us all over the world recognised the truth of that sentiment. It’s the people we care about that give most shape to our lives, whether they’re our partners, children, extended family, friends, colleagues or communities.

On one hand, this has become a truism of modern life: people matter. On the other, most of us forget it, every day. We take our loved ones for granted. We do what we need to, in order to keep the home fires burning or fulfil our social obligations, and we forget that this is a dimension of life in which we can either succeed or… not.

It could be our professional contacts, our colleagues, our friends, the other parents on the school run or our elderly next-door neighbour who really appreciates it when we pop around to say hi: when we connect in meaningful ways and give our time and attention to our relationships, our lives start to have more joy and meaning. More connection.

Experiences

When was the last time you did something just for fun? When did you last give yourself permission to visit a museum or walk in the woods? All of us need novelty, treats and intriguing situations. We need recreation and adventure. We need time to play.

If this sounds self-indulgent or irrelevant, think again. I know you’re busy, and I know you’re a grown up with lots of responsibilities. Doesn’t matter, you still need time to play! You probably have a job, or kids, or a job and kids. Maybe you have a sick relative you’re looking after, or a business that’s in trouble. If that’s the case, you are even more in need of nourishing experiences.

A life that has no room for a new experience is a life over which we have lost control. I’m not necessarily talking about sailing solo down the Amazon. It could just be going for lunch in the café you’ve always wanted to try, rather than eating a sandwich at your desk. We fill our lives with obligation and think there’s nothing we can do about it. Not true. Experiences, however grand or modest, are what we thrive on. They are the stories we tell our friends, our children and grandchildren. They are also the memories that sustain us in challenging times.

Spirituality

This is another of the dimensions of success that often provokes resistance. But spirituality doesn’t equal religion, or New Age thinking. (Not that there’s anything wrong with either of those things, at least not in my book.) Spirituality might consist of being mindful of every moment as precious, developing a personal system of values to live by, letting go of perfectionism and embracing the idea that life is a journey, or exploring your purpose. It can just as easily entail delving within ourselves to find stronger connections to others, as turning to God.

Nurturing our psyche and our soul makes our lives shine with peace, with acceptance of others and ourselves. In this state we are freed from constant ego-driven demands so that we can explore bigger questions and do greater work. Some of the most ‘alive’ people I’ve ever met are those who live within a spiritual framework they have figured out for themselves. That’s a huge achievement. That too is success.

Legacy

When we ask ourselves what trace we’d like to leave in the world, we naturally focus on what matters most to us. Do we want to leave a treasure trove of happy memories for our grandchildren, be remembered as the person who saved the local football pitches for future generations? Do we want to raise £10,000 for charity? Perhaps we want to be remembered as a loving husband or as a political activist who never gave up, or as a businesswoman who ran a company that employed dozens or hundreds or even thousands of people. There are infinite ways to leave behind something of value in the lives of others.

Imagine being in the crowd of mourners at your own funeral and listening to the eulogy. I bet you’d want to hear a sincere and emotional roll call of the traits people loved about you and the good things you did.

This might sound ghoulish but it is a fast track to thinking clearly about how to make the most of your potential. Most of us could do, be and give more: more of our attention, time, expertise or money. And most of us know this; it nags at us but we push it away.

When we know we’re running out of time we get on with the things we’ve always wanted to do but were too distracted or afraid to prioritise. Start those things right now.

Meet the 29 year olds in my life… and my 80 year old father

I have a 29 year old stepson who without realising it lives and breathes the seven dimensions of success along with his friends.

Right now, they’re all at the early stages of their lives and careers, and living in London they’re really focused on some aspects of wellbeing (mainly fitness); growth is tremendously important to them as they learn and develop in their careers. Achievement for them means pay increases and promotions. Relationships are equally important as they network and socialise around London and Europe meeting great people, adding to their networks, dating as they seek to find love and a longer term partnership with someone. Experiences are key to their joy in life… they’re always travelling Europe and beyond, clocking up the most amazing life adventures and creating memories. Right now, for my stepson and his friends, spirituality and legacy are not on their radars…. But one day they will be.

Then there’s my recently widowed father. He’s from New Zealand and a ‘country boy’ at heart. After dedicating himself for over two years to supporting my mother during her unexpected illness and subsequent passing, dad’s now recognised that he’s got plenty of life left in him – at least another 15+ years of quality living and experiences.

So, for him the seven dimensions play out as like this. Wellbeing – for the first time in a long time, dad’s recognised the importance of his health and he’s paying much more attention to it, seeking help as necessary to keep him in shape. Experiences are now all important to him! He wants to do and see things… he wants to travel… anywhere and everywhere – and that’s from a guy who for most of his life wasn’t too interested in much travel. Relationships are critical to dad – and always have been. He’s spending more time with people he loves and in doing so, he’s creating more of a legacy… memories he’ll leave behind after his time’s up on earth. Finally there’s spirituality. Dad’s not a religious man, but from time to time, he visits the church mum went to every week, as that was an important part of her life. In going to her church, dad reconnects with a place that was very special for mum, and with people whom she loved. It adds to the spiritual connection he now has with mum.

As I hope you can see, the seven dimensions of life can be applied in any stage in life and in any circumstances. I hope you’ll embrace them. What might they mean for you at your stage in life?

It’s time for your life to be in seven dimensions

Are you feeling fired up to get started on creating the life of your dreams, a life that’s alive in all seven dimensions? I want to inspire you to believe that you can turn your dreams into reality. Remember, what distinguishes people with lives that are alive, passionate and extraordinary as they define it, from those who are stuck in struggle or simmer, is that they have total clarity on what success means to them, great strategies to achieve it and are prepared to take massive action to make it happen. You can develop all those things too. Are you ready?

Would some guidance from me be helpful to you? If so, please arrange a free 30 mins Skype strategy meeting with me. Here’s my calendar to make an appointment. I’d love to support you in some way to gain ‘seductive clarity’ in any aspect of your business or life.